Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I just want nice things and good sex
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
