Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Can I color on your dick again?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Randomize
