MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
How external is "for external use only"?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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