"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
