Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
this is an emotional support booty call
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
