KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I currently don't understand fingers.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
