i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
