ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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