Pappa wants mamma naked
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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