im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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