oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
She said her name was "party"
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
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