Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
