I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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