Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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