I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Randomize
