Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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