used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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