i always forget guys have bellybuttons
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
