kristin has been a bad kristin
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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