Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry metman10 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(614): View more from Ohio

You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.

Fav 36 1279 3386
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.

Fav 18 1640 6929
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag

Fav 34 1967 5619
share tweet
(612): View more from Minnesota

Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard

Fav 9 1901 3422
share tweet
(678): View more from Georgia

My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.

Fav 14 7504 2479
share tweet
(312): View more from Illinois

I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.

Fav 18 2154 800
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+33): View more from France

It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"

Fav 3 1731 802
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(253): View more from Washington

I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''

Fav 2 427 206
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Your shit was massive.

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.

Fav 0 26 39
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT