dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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