Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
We need to get me chipped asap
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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