She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
smell my finger.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
