We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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