And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
