My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
