I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
