This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
