He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
