i think my mom watched the whole time
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Randomize
