Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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