Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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