Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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