Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
