why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
