Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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