What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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