my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
