The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
