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• (631): View more from New York

  I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.

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• (585): View more from New York

  My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  But truly, sorry about your empty vagina

  (1-720): View more from Colorado

  Thanks boo.

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