I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
