i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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