Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
