Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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