I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Randomize
