Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
