U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
