she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
