You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
it hurts more in the daytime
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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