have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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